NEW YORK ( MainStreet) — Here's a fun fact. Out in Japan they have these places called Love Hotels. They rent rooms for the sole purpose and duration of a quick fling with that special (or available) someone. While the Japanese certainly don't have the monopoly on hourly accommodation, for a long time they did have the market cornered on tackiness. A Japanese love hotel looks like something that exploded out of a Joel Schumacher movie .

No more. Today you can find mind bending decorations right here in the United States, with hotels that offer wild themes to couples looking for a getaway. Want to spend the night inside a giant mushroom? Check. A one-room castle with working drawbridge? We can do that. Ever wanted to bathe in a 15-foot-tall champagne glass? Step right this way.

So, in honor of the holiday and the hard work put in by hoteliers who have clearly found their calling, we present seven of the most bizarre romantic theme hotels for this Valentine's Day.

#1. The Loop Inn Motel: Crystal Chalice Suite

Be honest, some of you thought I was joking about that giant champagne glass up there in the introduction. Well never fear, because New Jersey's Loop Inn Motel delivers.

The Loop Inn's Crystal Chalice Suite is a fairly normal, tastefully appointed hotel room with a small sitting area on the first floor and a second story for the bedroom. It leaves behind traditional ideas of sanity, however, with the gigantic champagne glass bathtub which dominates the middle of the room. There's no angle from which you don't see the opportunity to soak in a gigantic replica of Marie Antoinette's left breast while overlooking your tiny empire.

For those who don't dream of taking a long soak every time they hit the bottle the Loop Inn also offers Rock Heaven, a suite that comes with its very own fake-underground swimming grotto . Not quite as nice as Hugh Heffner's, but considerably easier to score an invitation.

#2. The Madonna Inn

The Madonna Inn truly brings tacky to new and inspiring levels. The sheer volume of options of this hotel is the most impressive part about it, with over 100 rooms that each have their own themes. You could stay here every day for a month and not even see a third of what the Madonna has to offer.

Some keep it simple, like the dark wood and leather of Harvard Square. Others go wildly over the top, like Kona Rock's faux-lava rock walls or the Just Heaven room's vaguely menacing cherubs. A few rooms swing for the fences and end up somewhere just plain weird, like a suite modeled after the Li'l Abner comic, or one which comes equipped with a stagecoach for a bed.