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Stop Hating Amazon or Jeff Bezos Will Have You Killed

Tickers in this article: SBUX AMZN AAPL
NEW YORK ( TheStreet) -- "Crazy Cramer," as my daughter calls him, hit the nail on the head in a Real Money column about Amazon's (AMZN) massive $3 billion bond offering:

Perhaps the most salient part of this bond deal? It's the fact that Amazon has opportunities that big. I bet if you asked most of the retailers in this country what they could do with $3 billion they would say "I don't know, we are pretty much everywhere we want to be already, maybe we can buy back stock.

Extend that out. If you asked most companies -- retail or otherwise -- what they could do with $3 billion they would say, no clue " ... maybe we could buy back stock."

Soon-to-be-departed Sirius XM (SIRI) CEO Mel Karmazin said exactly that to Cramer on CNBC's "Mad Money" several weeks ago. Even Apple (AAPL) sits on its cash, opting to defy Steve Jobs with a dividend/buyback. Like so many other companies, it keeps much of its war chest overseas.

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I have been saying it every which way for over a year. Forget what your Grandpa taught you about investing as he held court at breakfast over the business section. We don't measure tickers by eighths anymore. Your MBA will do you no good here. Guys like Jeff Bezos rule the world. And they threw the MBA playbook -- at least the conventional one -- out the window a long time ago.

Pretend you live in a dictatorship. A brutal, awful dictatorship where women get stoned for wearing skirts and toughs randomly pick men off the street and beat them senseless for swigging a beer in public. A place where The State says "Jump" and you say "How high?"

But, if you can call it one, there is a bright side to this dictatorship. When you're about to get stoned or have your butt whipped, you can pull out the all-clear card. Some form of proof that you are an Amazon stockholder. At that point, you can take off the skirt and wave an open bottle if you so desire.

Because, like it or not, fair or not, Amazon is good for the country. And, if you're even a wee bit patriotic, you should support this company.

Tuesday, on my Twitter, guys I respect (like Adam Lashinsky at Fortune) called Amazon out for a press release where it said We doubled the number of Kindles we sold, year-over-year, on the holiday weekend . The complaint: Amazon never gives us unit sales so we have no way to quantify the statement.

Who cares!? Why does it matter? The company does a freaking trillion dollars in revenue every quarter. It's the only one in the nation really spending to help stimulate the economy. OK, wait, Howard Schultz at Starbucks (SBUX) deserves equal credit.